So last night tim was siting out on the patio enjoying the fresh mintyness of a cigarette when all of a sudden like a drunk ghetto Santa clause some dude hopped over the fence. Tim happened to notice that this unexpected visitor was bleeding as this guy started

let me just say, these notes produced some random things.  I am not going to type it however many times and send it along, so here it is.  25 random things about me.

1. a am a little bit afraid of the dark.

2. i hate my mouth.

3. I had a sock static clung to my pantleg today.

4. I am craving a hot fudge sunday, or a martini.

5 I confess, I’d like both

1.  too much coffee makes me cracke dout.

2. i love beans and toast.

3. i love mac, hate windows.

4. I prefer english period films when it is cold out, action or animation in the summer.

5.  I love orange, but not all shades of orange.

6. I am almost over my modern furniture stage.

7.  I miss the one bedroom apartment next to me.

8. I once had to go number 2 at Club Montage and almost cried, but gave the doorman 40 dollars to not let anyone in while I was going.

9.  I love flaming hot potato chips.

10. I’m bored with this list.

This is shaping up to be a very busy tornado meets volcano  sort of week.  My life seems to be spinning past and around me like the cinnabar skirt of a whirling dervish.

My wit supreme is of no use this week, some things cannot be glossed over.

We are getting a new foster child today, a 16 year old girl with a lot of spark.  Something tells me she is going to run me ragged.  I also started working at my new job this past Monday, while still working at my old job. Can candles have 4 wicks?

More good news in the life category.   I found my old and very dear friend Tim on facebook.  Oddly enough through one of HIS friends that last I knew hated me, or so I gathered as he whizzed by on his bicycle flipping me the bird.  So I have not seen Tim in a very very long time, almost 5 or 6 years I think.  I have known Tim since I was getting discharged from the military in 1997.  Oh what stories I could tell you.  We have lived together, as friends, a couple times.  Anyway, we are meeting on Sunday for a “catch-up” lunch.  I’m excited, I mean who doesn’t like lunch? Right,  Just kidding.  I should mention I have spent countless hours trying to track him down, do you know that there are more than a handful of Beverly Barrs in Ohio?  Shameful.

Tim is like Bill Gates and I am Steve Jobs without the weight loss and millions of dollars.  At some point, he went hardcore windows, and I went the way of the lucious, stable and well thought out Apple.  That is how life goes, once you have chosen different operating systems, you have an uphill battle.

I am very happy to be welcoming 2 people into my life today.  One new with a whole life in front of her, and one older with a whole history shared between us.  LIfe is amazing.

I have worked for the same guy since  forever, it has been…well it has been.  Time to move along.

I have been married almost 6 months and we arte both still alive with all of our limbs,  I surely cannot be the only surprised person.  So I’ll take this moment and say to Tim, my husband,  I love you, you big jerk.

It has been a long week, a week filled. period.

By the way, finished a website today.

http://derickson2.com/

When your child leaves.  It is a dark gray, soggy wool sock in the mouth fishing twine and electrial tape around your insides type of feeling.  I, needless to say, don’t like it.

My heart is a little bit broken right now, and I have a nice tall glass of “feeling nothing” in front of me.  It isn’t working.  I’m no Auntie Mame.

Tim and I will try again.  We will also stay in contact with Paul.  For him, and for us.

1.  My sister gets into town tomorrow.

2. My foster son is going to a different placement setting.

3. I’m getting married.(not a mixed blessing, just for the record)

4. I went and had my favorite sandwich last night, and I don’t like it anymore.

5. I get to leave work early, only to come home and help my son pack his stuff.

I went to private school, a mixed blessing, that no matter how you spin it, felt like being sent away. ( I really want to add here that I realize the sacrifices that it took to send me to SJMA, and it was an amazing opportunity.  It was just a difficult situation being gay, and dealing with abandonment issues) In the oversized business class vehicle that my father would drive me back to my teenage angst in, was a radio.  My father was a firm supporter of public TV and Radio.  From the accursed radio would come those magic words “This is NPR, All things considered”  They certainly were not considering that I did not want to be stuck in the car for 89 minutes listening to them, that is for sure. But as the love of tomato sandwiches grew in my adult years so did my appreciate of the Public Broadcast System.  My father and I never really spoke in the car on those trips, he listened to the radio, and I listened to the building dread inside me.  How much better would I know my father if he had turned the radio off or if I had made the effort to speak?

Let me start by saying “I will be going back to bed”.  It is 5:44am on a Sunday.  I thought I was being all sweet getting Tim up at 5 who most grumpily replied that he was taking a later bus.  If there is a later bus, why not take it every day?  Oh well, he is a grown man and capable of getting to work.  We really should not try to talk that early in the morning anyway, as we both have the confusions, mumbles and grumpies at that time.  I generally love mornings, no one is bothering me, calling me or asking me to do anything.  The plus side of being 33 is that I can normally get away with that at 7, no need to be up at 5.  So I sucked down a cigarette, which I really need to quit,  threw on some flip flops and headed to the beach.  took the dog for a walk.  She is always so happy to be taken out, a task that others have been doing more than myself of late.  Now we are warm in the house, with this terrific Maui like breeze coming in through the screen door and windows.  Sable is curled up in a little black ball of fuzz, the hides the fact that she is almost a 50 pound dog, she still looks like a baby to me. Ah, she is out of her ball now and resting her head on the arm of the sofa.  She appears to be enjoying the morning breeze as much as I am, she keeps licking the air.  Winter is coming, at long last.  Funny that I should be living in the desert and hating the heat.  There is a payoff, isn’t there always?, Fall, Winter and Spring here are all like fall and spring in Chicago.  My two favorite times of year.  I like little slugs on the littler of amber leaves raked into rebellious piles.  I just don’t like raking them into piles.  Do people still rake leaves?  

I am getting married in 6 days, 11 hours and 7 minutes.  I have become a human countdown timer. oops  6 min.  See?  I’m so excited I want to just hold still and not do anything at all, for fear of something going wrong.   Fine way to live life, like some innocuous fruit or vegetable suspended for all time in a giggling, reticent ring of tomato aspic.

Who do you think had to input all the correct spelling of words into spell check.  Sometimes I type a word, the check fairy underlines it in her 3rd grade teacher approved red line and I am convinced that they are incorrect and that I have spelled it as correctly as is possible.

I am supposed to clean today, dust and the lot.  I resent dust.  It is like the old troll at the bar that just keeps coming back for more rejection, no matter how much you tell him to stay away.  It just keeps coming back, dusters, pledge and a shrunken t-shirt, vacuum or whatnot it just reappears.  I think, sometimes, no matter how illogically, that my electronics have all been shipped to my house with a built in dust dispenser.  Maybe the spell check fairy has cursed me with dust for telling him that vacuum really has one “u” and an “e” at the end of it.  I have been granted the power of revenge against EL Senior Spell Check, I can now add the spelling of particular words to the Spell Check Dictionary.  That can’t end well.  One erroneous click of the mouse and Tim forever becomes Tium.  I have not yet figured out how to REMOVE a word from said dictionary.

I have to go now, this has been all things reconsidered.

So here I am at dnner with tim and feeling tired. I love love love him.

So here I sit again at the DES office with the boss. No worries really as work was slow anyway.

Tim has the night in beach ville. How nice for him.

The goodness is that I have Friday off of with which is fantastic news. I am going to spend this weekend cleaning out my closet I think. Getting rid of my dresser and whatnot. I want to put a closet system in. I am nowthinking that a better idea mght be 2 short dressers instead though. Argu!!!!!!!!